“Whether you’re married or in love, you have to work hard to do one thing: give each other a sense of security.”
A perfect marriage never depends on “whom to marry”, but on the “sense of security” established by two people. This is the strongest wall of marriage and the most fresh-keeping potion of love.
But the sense of security can not only rely on the other party to give themselves, but also give themselves a sense of security first, and then give the other party a sense of security.
A friend of mine thinks that her boyfriend’s most moving sentence is: “OK, you stand where you are now, I’ll find you right away.”
Because she is a road maniac, she feels very safe every time she hears this sentence. Because she trusted her boyfriend enough, she believed that he would find her.
After the establishment of trust, there will be a sense of security. As long as there is enough trust between you, your feelings will be in a safe range.
Love should allow each other privacy and secrets, if you all know each other’s secrets is not a good thing. As long as you all believe in each other enough, you will not doubt and suspect each other, and you will be assured that you will not give pressure to each other and yourself.
Many people who have no sense of security will place their sense of security on something or relationship. This kind of sustenance is often full of many variables and is not very reliable. The world is unpredictable. The external environment and things are always changing. Therefore, it is not wise to place a sense of security on these.
Learn to self-identity, so that you get a sense of security, but also give each other space.